Hate Toontown
by ChipChallenge149
Summary: This song is about drugs.
1. You

**Number 1: I hate you.  
><strong>I see you are on toontown. I never really liked playing it. I have played it before, but for my lifetime total, it was only 260 minutes. Over a year that was 43 seconds a day. Some people play toontown every day. Oh yeah? Well...some people smoke weed every day! Some people smoke it for 42.7 seconds every time and over the year it becomes 4 hours 20 minutes. Do you smoke weed? Toontown does. I hate weed because it is what you do. Sure, I'll pull weeds from the garden, but I will not bring my lighter outside to the garden. I cannot remember; does toontown have a garden? I remember houses with yards. And doodles. I see your doodle! Only someone high would have allowed people to see its doodle! All you can see is toontown. And you want to walk up to Mickey Mouse? I want to assassinate him but only on toontown! Mickey Mouse is the main character on toontown; get rid of him and they're all going to burn in hell. You really need to stop or that happens to me too. I like mickey mouse but he needs to leave toontonw. And don't go to Disneyland because it is in a city called Heidenheim. General Fatface lives here and he is a nazi. So if you want to go to disneyland, be prepared for some Wolfenstein to happen. However, Disneyland will hate you for bringing your chaingun inside. Mickey mouse will have none of that. The safest state to be in is Maine. If you do not live in Maine then I hate you. It's the state furthest from California, which contains DisneyLand. Now, if you ever play toontown, you should know that it doesn't exist in 2014 ! So just play something else. And please, don't beat the dead mouse. We don't need any of that.


	2. Channel 4

**Number 2: I hate Channel 4.**

I was watching Channel 11 until Richard walked in. Then he changed the channel to 4. The Disney channel. Goddammit, Richard! It's your favorite TV program, but I can't stand it. Either way, I sit while I watch the television. I'm going to stand up and walk out of the room instead. I walked outside of the house to find a man smoking. As I walked past him, he threw a box at me and told me to take it because I would need one too. Hell no, I don't, I say to him. I threw it at the neighbor's open window where a girl was playing, none other than, the notorious, Toontown! Thank you, she says. Never mind, I say to the smoking man. Drugs just aren't for me, we all know. I come back in to the house. Richard says to me, the party don't start till he walk in. I'm mad. So I tell him, go find yourself a good show, or go fuck yourself in hell. He gets off the couch and outside, like myself earlier. Now Kesha is on the TV, with her drunk bitch song about time. That's what Richard was talking about. Twenty minutes later I find Richard with a weed caught in his tongue. The only problem was, that he left the house at 4 PM. We all know what time it is now. He said he can't get the weed out of his mouth. And, as if he had not found a good show, I tell him that he can fellatio to get it out. Then he can at least fulfill what I wanted him done. When I finally turned back to Channel 11, the channel had a fire alarm interrupt the show. A fire in the county had just occurred from a kitchen pot. And I don't believe it was a house fire. I think it was a pot called marijuana that caused fire. It turns out, this was Channel 7, because Richard took off four from eleven. What a dufus!


	3. Toontown

**Number 3: I hate toontown.**

Does anybody have any idea where Toontown is? Where in hell is it? It's the worst game over Fan Fiction. And I have not even played most of those games on the website! It must be gay since it's saved on You Tube. Here is how: "When I was in third grade, I thought I was gay…If I was gay, I think hip hop would hate me. Have you read the You Tube comments lately?" People around the world hate gay then too. And 7002 people in the world hate hip-hop. Some other 14004 people hate tontoown. So as we can see, that is all of us who can count, Toontown is twice as unpopular as rape. Those two are synonyms. Gay is synonymous with the lesser. Even Bronu Mars says that by the time he receives this he will have spiraled up. Also, he would never do a thing to let those cowards fuck his world up! All you cowards that play toontown this year are faggot maggots! Cowards prefer to smoke faggots to fags. All of you who have ever encountered the number 74668, and you live in Oklahoma, you must know something: It's not your Zoning Improvement Plan code. Everybody else out of that state would know…it's text-language for shoot. It could actually be 323 other words, but some aren't English or whatever language you would prefer. 7 could mean Q, which would be followed by a 8. And only then, it can be the second 8, being U. QWERTYUIOPASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM! Damn does anybody know where that came from? I know. Read your keyboard to figure it. Then you can be like Richard from Chapter 2 and squeeze a lemon into your eye. Or take the batteries out of your eyes. Both mean drop acid. In the meantime, while I have complained about Toon Town's bad reputation, I also found Toontowns' location. It's in Heidenheim, Germany. It's at 48.7° latitude and 10.2° longitude. Let's not get into anymore shit on Toontown now.


	4. Toontile

**Number 4: I hate toontile.**

Once upon a time. There was a man and he was a Doctor. Doctor Who was his full name. We don't know who his first name is. And he was from England. But he talked so damn fast, that when he told his girlfriend that he hated sitting in the tardis, all the Americans thought he said he hated toontile. We americans had to watch Youtube with captions when the english people spoke. Toontile sounds like a Deutsch bag. The meth users from Spain used -bolsas de alemán- so they could use METH on the toontile. Mickey mouse one time stood on the toontile and the other toons got mad at him. They shot him with meth guns til he got high. And the toontile was up to the roof! The roof had duck shit cause the only animal in Toon town that could fly was a duck. Flying animals sometime excrete when they fly but the roof is only the place they would do it in tootnown. A dukc then got shot on accident. That duck that was shot got high for jumping up while the gun went off. It gave him a head start for the roof. The duck flew all the way over Mickey Mouse and had an urge to poop. Mickey mouse was too high from the meth bullets to realize that he had the bird shit on his head. A cat ate the duck when it finished flight. Cats can jump high as hell but not fly. But the cats like eating mice more than birds. They don't eat Mickey, though, because he is of major importance. And like I said in chapter 1, they would rather kill mice than have Mickey assassinated. There actually were no regular mice in this fight. The moment that Mickey Mouse decided to get off toontile was when it was still on the roof. He dropped like acid.


	5. John Smith

**Number 5: I hate John Smith.**

John Smith is a cat. I hate cats. Cats are also on Toontown. We must all remember the cat in the last chapter that ate a duck. No I am not a duck. I'm a person. The ducks of toontown fuck and cluck. But before, I mentioned that they shit and click. This is just the last chapter; if there was a chapter six it would have told you that I hate cats. But then again John Smith is Roger Wilcos cousin. Once on a game called Space Quest, Roger Wilco tried every way to die. The twelfth way he died was called Drop Acid. Roger was walking through a cave and got to the top of it when three drops of acid started falling on him. Now, if I can prove this on a damn youtube upload, some of you might believe me. John Smith is a bathroom artist. He puts graffiti in any bathroom that anyone would go in. Not men's restrooms. He would rather let everybody see his art. Not women's restrooms. He doesn't want to be caught in the wrong place at the right time. Or any other time. Give me a second…I need to get my story straight. My friends are in the bathroom getting higher than the empire state. Although the cat Jonh Smith lives in toontown, his friends all live in New York. Remember that Toon town is in Germany. Once Disney land changed its name from Anaheim to Heidenheim, they had to move out of California. The school in toontown gets out at 1:20 AM Tuesday to Saturday. They are, actually, nine hours ahead of California. Their longitude was moved about 135 degrees east. And in chapter three the coordinates were mentioned for Heidenheim germany. It's dark as hell when they get out of school, so they use lighters to find their way home. Actually they go home with joint lighters. They just go home and they're off to bed. No more dinner for toonwotn since they eat it at school!


End file.
